Sooner or later the people in this country are going to realize: the government does not give a f**k about them. "Here's all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. The quote continues: "They own all the important land. TOP 25 QUOTES BY GEORGE CARLIN (of 976) | A-Z Quotes 30. Scratch any cynic and you will find a disappointed idealist. I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, Wheres the self-help section? She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose. 11. 122. To me, authority is something that a freer spirit, a more independent mind, and a person who can handle the world, doesnt need guidance from. We havent tried that for a while. The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity. ~ (George Carlin). The strikes left 34 people injured, including three children, and caused widespread damage. If you're born in America you get a front row seat. The following statement is true. Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why not? Soon enough youll be dead and burning in Hell with the rest of your family. Save the trees, save the bees, save the whales, save those snails. ~ (George Carlin). Have you ever wondered why Republicans are so interested in encouraging people to volunteer in their communities? George Carlin | American comedian And probably increase. ~ (George Carlin). The planet isnt going anywhere. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid. 8. Deal with it. ~ (George Carlin). He also suggests that politicians are merely the puppets bringing big businesses plans and ideas to fruition. George Carlin was posthumously awarded the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor in 2008, after he passed away that year at the age of 71. Thats the only thing keeping it and expanding it wherever possible. 48. 40. 82. Trouble is, most of them suck. ~ (George Carlin). Its what our system produces: Garbage in. Ill let Carlin tell you what he thinks. The legendary George Carlin reminded us to think deeply but to make sure we take time to laugh and never take ourselves too seriously. It will be Nike sneakers and Smiley shirts. 98. Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity. 44. Web"The reason I talk to myself is because Im the only one whose answers I accept" - George Carlin Vote 3 comments Add a Comment Slartibartfast39 2 hr. Lee did not involve himself formally in politics, but he was a symbol of diversity and the synthesis of "East" and "West." ", "Catholics and other Christians are against abortions and they're against homosexuality. If work is so terrific, how come they have to pay you to do it? And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid. 116. Carlin is a philosopherwho follows logicTo claim he is left or right is obtuse. Just cause you got the monkey off your back doesnt mean the circus has left town. What kind of pro-life is that? He was one of the first to know it was all bullshit propagated by government and corporate elites. Life is a series of dogs. ~ (George Carlin). 93. Its so f***ing heroic. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. ~ (George Carlin). 3. Then they think you are just fine, just what they've been looking for. You don't. I consider them to be symbols and I leave symbols to the symbol minded. ~ (George Carlin). 123. If this is the best God can do, Im not impressed. ~ (George Carlin). Im Chandan Negi, the Founder of Internet Pillar. I love sharing quotes and sayings to inspire and motivate people. I just dont have as many people who believe it. ~ (George Carlin). Quotes by George Carlin One of the most iconic comedians of all time. The surgeon general warned today that saliva causes stomach cancer. And far from staying to the safer path, he leapt time and again past the cliff of common wisdom, in the hopes of rattling us into questioning the way we live. It presents itself as An outsider: someone not part of the group. Unlikely_Let2616 29 min. George Carlin Quotes WebGovernments don't want a population capable of critical thinking, they want obedient workers, people just smart enough to run the machines and just dumb enough to You wouldn't say I'm proud to be 5'11"; I'm proud to have a pre-disposition for colon cancer., "Here's a bumper sticker I'd like to see.We are the proud parents of a child who has resisted his teachers' attempts to break his spirit and bend him to the will of his corporate masters. 34. The [], The 4th President of the United States was an American statesman, diplomat, and Founding Father. "Think about how stupid the average person is, and then realize that half of 'em are stupider than that. They dont pass through a membrane from another reality. Everyone should try to scratch their name on the bomb of life. Fortunately, fans of Carlin are not easily persuaded that everything must align with partisan preference. As a lifelong stand-up comedian, Carlin had a lot of opportunities to speak his mindand religion and politics were two of his favorite subjects. I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a guy nailed to two pieces of wood. ~ (George Carlin). Bipartisan usually means that a larger-than-usual deception is being carried out. Im fu*kin serious! ~ (George Carlin). Teach them to question everything. Report 48 points POST Looking at you religion. Im always relieved when someone is delivering a eulogy and I realize Im listening to it. And armbands. We dont have people like that in this country. He was a true originala brash, intelligent, eloquent voice that cut to the quick. George Carlin:::Political quotes Just when I discovered the meaning of life, they changed it. ~ (George Carlin). Some national parks have long waiting lists for. ", Capitalism tries for a delicate balance: It attempts to work things out so that everyone gets just enough stuff to keep them from getting violent and trying to take other peoples stuff., "Bipartisan usually means that a larger-than-usual deception is being carried out. There are no innocent human beings. ~ (George Carlin). Carlin, who was known for spewing critical rhetoric against the government, organized religion and big business, first delivered the quote during his 2005 HBO comedy special, Life Is Worth Losing. Just a friendly reminder that George Carlin would despise and verbally disembowel the vast majority of pundits, public figures, and random idiots currently heaping praise on him because it's trendy. Find one that fits for you, but dont make me wear your shoes. ~ (George Carlin). They are our elected officials. ~ (George Carlin). The challenge is to find it. ~ (George Carlin). International Dance Day 2023: WhatsApp messages, wishes, ", "Conservatives don't give a shit about you until you reach military age. George Carlin quotes government sayings, in particular, are thought-provoking. He had a way of critiquing and making fun of the government without necessarily getting into trouble. This made him outstanding. Conservatives say if you dont give the rich more money, they will lose their incentive to invest. The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. George Carlin was way ahead of his time. Everybody says they suck. It will be Nike sneakers and Smiley shirts. Enjoy! Famous quotes on life, death, politics and of course the American government. I do, however, have a fear of falling from heights. ~ (George Carlin). He described himself thus: "Im a rude dude, but Im the real deal. WebTop 10 George Carlin Quotes. Let a smile be your umbrella, and youll end up with a face full of rain. ~ (George Carlin). They brought a new era to the world [], An outstanding jurist and the second woman ever appointed to the U.S. Supreme Court, Ruth Bader Ginsburg trail blazed through [], When trying to write about Ariana Grande, one word comes directly to the mind and sums up everything: phenomenon. I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, Wheres the self-help section? She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose. I respect animals. The reason I talk to myself is because Im the only one whose answers I accept. ~ (George Carlin). But once you're born, you're on your own. I think people should be allowed to do what they want. And term-limits aint going to do you any good. It presents itself as fairness, yet attempts to restrict and control people's language with strict codes and rigid rules. Where are all the bright, honest, intelligent Americans ready to step in and save the nation and lead the way? Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity. Carlin was at his best talking about America's broken political system, summing up the anger, resentment and frustration felt by much of the population who knew something was wrong but could not express it. Carlin did this better than anyone else. Why? ago Close joke from Blackadder that might predate this. Its never just a game when youre winning. ~ (George Carlin). Thats the problem." The people are f***ed. Germany lost the Second World War. It will be a lot of fun. Heres all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. Theres no present. War, disease, death, destruction, hunger, filth, poverty, torture, crime, corruption, and the Ice Capades. We could see through the hypocracy and illogic of our parents and teachers, but because of our age and size we couldn't do anything about it. Carlin proved that mixing comedy with thought-provoking ideas is perhaps the only way to get people to listen. 49. ', and 'Here's all you The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. ~ (George Carlin). And how many more manners and gestures [], Quiet spoken, with an amiable smile and an elfin like quality, Eckhart Tolle is the author of international bestsellers The [], Class struggle, class consciousness, alienation, communism and the face of Karl Marx in numerous posters in teenagers and students [], At the age of 12 he tamed a wild stallion, Bucephalus, that later became his beloved companion in battle, and [], Born in 1452, in Anchiano, Tuscany, Leonardo di ser Piero Da Vinci was best known for his paintings of Mona [], Truly adorable and friendly, Leo Buscaglia, aka Dr. Gov Greg Abbott is using the border crisis to hurt Black-run, Media Matters bombshell: Tucker Carlson caught slamming streaming service Fox Nation, Donald Trump to participate in a CNN presidential town hall next week, Hillary Clinton shares a graph to slam Trump on natl debt & gets help finishing it, See if you can figure out what President Joe Biden is doing in this clip, Charles Payne spots yet another reason to ban congressional stock trading ASAP, NBC News Ben Collins is sick and tired of editorial boards not talking to actual reporters like, CNN asks why SO many of us are unhappy with the country and THIS is why we cant have nice things, Group that went to bat for UVA hate crime hoaxer rages at right-wing media for telling the, Here's the Montana state rep who'd rather her daughter commit suicide than transition, ABC News: LGBTQ+ lawmakers finding themselves fighting literally just 'to exist', Antony Blinken too busy to say if he accepts that Hunter Biden's laptop was not disinformation, California Do Not Sell My Personal Information, George Carlin wouldnt even want to be claimed as your partisan hero and if that offends you his legacy lives on. And although I broke a lot of laws as a teenager, I straightened out immediately upon turning eighteen, when I realized the state had a legal right to execute me. ~ (George Carlin). Nothing changed. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. This country was bought and sold and paid for a long time ago. I consider them to be symbols and I leave symbols to the symbol minded. ~ (George Carlin). I dont vote. Cant lie around thats their job! 100. What you should tell them is, 'Maybe not. Carlin didnt hesitate to criticize presidents by name Bill Clinton and George W. Bush among them but, more often, he spoke in broader terms and 77. Tell them the paint is wet, and they have to touch it to be sure. ~ (George Carlin). 21 George Carlin Quotes On Government And Politics That in of itself should make you think.Carlin performed many standup comedy routines and HBO specials, acted in dozens of television and movie productions, recorded spoken-word albums, and was the author of several books, with titles like Brain Droppings (97) and Napalm and Silly Putty (01).What I loved about Carlin was his dedication to freethinking and independent thought. Im happy to tell you there is very little in this world that I believe in. ~ (George Carlin). After harping on his skepticism of politicians, particularly Democratic presidential nominee Joe Biden, 51-year-old Ice Cube doubled down on his distrust of the government on Tuesday by sharing a famous quote by the late, great comedian George Carlin on Twitter. They should be giving their money to you. And secondly, I dont vote cause I believe if you vote, you have no right to complain. This is the best we can do folks. 1. 61. George Carlin Quotes (Author of Brain Droppings) Well who has less abortions than homosexuals? If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity. For your favorite quotes. God has a three-day weekend. ~ (George Carlin). So maybe maybe MAYBE, its not the politicians who suck. 97. Two reasons I dont vote: first of all, its meaningless. Dont give your money to the church. This country was founded by slave owners who wanted to be free. Manage Settings They don't want to hear from you. Religion is like a pair of shoes. By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth. I hate a group of people with a 'common purpose'. 11 Profound Quotes on Politics by George Carlin But there is an I in independence, individuality, and integrity. These bright quotes will inspire you to not to take things so seriously in life! Trump's latest attack addresses DeSantis' overseas trips to the U.K., Israel, Florida's Covid-19 record, and polling support for the 2024 Presidential race. Web421 quotes from George Carlin: 'The reason I talk to myself is because Im the only one whose answers I accept. Carlin passed away in 2008 of heart failure.With his sparkling intellect and caustic humour, George Carlin derided and criticized political, religious, cultural and taboo subjects. 24. 27 George Carlin Quotes For Freethinkers and Rebels, Skip our thoughts on George Carlin and jump straight to the quotes, 26 Voltaire Quotes Everyone Should Read Today, Bipartisan Bill Would Ban Children Under 13 From Using Social Media, Anti-Gun Yard Signs Are an Invitation To Criminals. Its hard to say if he was a Republican or a Democrat, however, as he refused to vote, considering it pointless because voting, as he said, is the illusion of choice.[4]. Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that. The reason I talk to myself is because Im the only one whose answers I accept. 113. The reason I talk to myself is because Im the only one whose answers I accept. ~ (George Carlin). Have you ever wondered why Republicans are so interested in encouraging people to volunteer in their communities? Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? ~ (George Carlin). No contest. Military cemeteries around the world are packed with brainwashed dead soldiers who were convinced God was on their side. Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. 47. Stop to think who it is we kill? If you cant beat them, arrange to have them beaten. ~ (George Carlin). 125 Best George Carlin Quotes on Life - Parade Bruce Lee was raised Catholic and Buddhist. So I have solved this little political dilemma for myself in a very simple way: on election-day, I-STAY-HOME. Language is the landscape of thought. ~ (George Carlin). The planet is fine. They're all in favor of the unborn. Anthony Hopkins is a pantheist-Catholic-agnostic who believes strongly in God. George Carlin Quotes George Carlin If holy people are so interested in politics, government, and public policy, let them pay the price of admission like everybody else. 90. It will be Nike sneakers and Smiley shirts. But first thing the next morning, I became a sun-worshipper. 53. Electricity is really just organized lightning. Garbage out. Nothing is mentioned, though, about cursing a lack of candles. ~ (George Carlin). Both the Left and the Right have been known to use his insights to demonstrate their own points. Our enemies pray for God to destroy us. America prays for God to destroy our enemies. And in 2017,Rolling Stone magazine ranked Carlin second on its list of the 50 Best Stand-Up Comics of All Time, just behind Richard Pryor. George Carlin Quotes George Denis Patrick Carlin or better known as George Carlin is a Grammy Award-winning American solo comedian, actor and writer. Though Carlin criticized the Libertarian Party (sorry fellow libertarians), his rebellion against the status quo and political tyranny encompassed the libertarian attitude and spirit. 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